Separate rooms, lasting marriage?

Naturally, couples share a room and a bed. But some experts are of the view that couples who sleep in separate rooms are most likely to have a successful marriage. According to an article on online magazine Daily Mail, this allows individuals to behave as they please in their own space and there is less stress in the marriage. Mwereti Kanjo takes up the issue with local experts.

When a couple does not share a room, people often conclude that there is trouble in paradise. But some experts are encouraging couples to sleep separately, stating it is likely that such couples will be happy and have a lasting marriage.

Commenting on a similar article run In Daily Mail, Dr Neil Stanley, a leading sleep expert in the United Kingdom, said couples who sleep together suffer sleep disturbance for at least 50 percent of the night caused by either snoring, fidgeting, duvet-stealing or trips to the toilet.

Stanley himself does not share a room with his wife of nine years.

Associate professor in psychology, Chiwoza Bandawe says sleeping in separate beds makes more sense for couples who have been having problems and are trying to work things out. He says, where the couple is still happy and in their honey moon period, it does not make sense.

“If sleeping together is causing stress in the marriage, then it becomes ideal for the other to move out. The stress comes from things like snoring, one partner opting to sleep with the lights on and so on. It all comes down to sleeping comfortably,” explains Bandawe.

The natural assumption would be that couples who do not share a bed do not have a good sex life, a point marriage counsellor Constance Masamba agrees with.

She says all the snoring in the world should not drive a partner away because people who claim to be in love must know each other inside out. Sharing a bed allows couples to share body warmth and play with each other in the middle of the night. This brings intimacy within the marriage.

“Sleeping in different rooms or on different beds brings estrangement in a marriage. A couple must not only be together for sex. It is important to cuddle and talk after sex which can only happen if you are sharing a bed. This thing of comfort is solved by buying a big enough bed which allows you to toss and turn,” said Masamba.

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Separate rooms, lasting marriage?

Naturally, couples share a room and a bed. But some experts are of the view that couples who sleep in separate rooms are most likely to have a successful marriage. According to an article on online magazine Daily Mail, this allows individuals to behave as they please in their own space and there is less stress in the marriage. Mwereti Kanjo takes up the issue with local experts.

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