2011 haunted by satan?

Sometimes, the things you don’t want to remember are the very things you can’t forget.

And for 2011, the list of unforgettables is longer than the Zambezi. This year, Malawi nosedived into an abyss of hopelessness.

At both ends of the long rope of misfortunes is Satan, so says Bingu wa Mutharika.

Informed by a strong conviction, Bingu said that the problems plaguing the country are the dirty works of Lucifer’s hands.

We know Satan is not holy.  When he sets his foot in, we are in for a fiery hell. No wonder he is reportedly sipping the fuel stations dry, using his drink to fire up emotions in politicians.

Satan has emptied the maize silos too and now the staple’s price  is on the rise, leaving the populace stranded with empty baskets.

Satan is also drinking from our taps. The pipes and our throats are dry and cracked.

Satan just can’t leave us alone! He has now diverted power lines to his dark kingdom, leaving Malawi holding on to persistent blackouts. He, too, robbed us of 20 lives on July 20. And what about Robert Chasowa?

Is Satan coming for more in 2012? Will he continue holding Malawians hostage?

I hope Satan has had enough and is ready to go. Or should we organise a vigil against his monstrous forces?

But he could probably be staying put at some comfortable haven with so much security you can’t even stage a protest outside his gates.

Perhaps he is using the forex to buy his luxuries. I guess if Satan’s palace had a spokesperson, he or she would quickly refute some of these accusations.

Satan’s censorship board would arrest all people making allegations at the podium.

I now only wait to hear from George Thindwa and the Association of Secular Humanism who are convinced that neither God nor Satan exist.

George, is Satan a creation of our own illusions? Is he a man that walks on two legs?

Adieus 2011 and the unwelcome visitor . Welcome a better 2012.