Celebrating unique beauty with art

I grew up enduring a lot of bullying and teasing because of my perceived physical flaws. The said flaws included my big eyes, the big forehead, the gap in my teeth and of course my slender body frame.

Playing while teasing each other was the order of the day and words such as “maso ngati ma golobo” or “chipumi ngati bwalo la mpira” were sarcastically directed at me.

Did it hurt? Yes. Did it hurt all the time? No! With time I learned to laugh off the bullying and embrace my perceived flaws. Actually, as I grew up, I realised that the so called flaws on my body and face made me the unique human being that I am. So, I started celebrating them and emphasizing them as my marks of beauty.

Mine is a story that many women can relate to. There is always that part of one’s body that others or oneself perceive as imperfect.

Fast-forward to adulthood, more women are realising the same even though we still have some people who look at these things as flaws.

This is probably why poet Tendai Shaba came up with a series of poems celebrating such perceived flaws.

In an interview, he said after noticing the misconception in society about these ‘marks of beauty’ he decided to use his art to celebrate them to change the narrative.

“These poems were written to specifically remind women that they are beautiful even with their perceived flaws, insecurities and imperfections,” Shaba said.

He said with the emergence of social media, bullying based on one’s looks happens often.

“Most people just opt to disable the comments to discourage the practice,” said Shaba.

The poet said on social media others just block the negative comments while some struggle to cope with the negative perceptions.

“It is important that there are various body shaming campaigns that are effectively helping people rediscover their true beauty by boosting their self esteem,” said Shaba.

Some of the poems that Shaba has released are titled A Lady with a Big Forehead, A Lady with Big Eyes, A Lady with Gap Teeth, A Tall Lady, A short Lady, A Slender lady, A Lady with a Big Body.

Reactions from many women who have read Shaba’s poems on social media have been positive as they shared pictures of themselves highlighting and celebrating their perceived flaws.

Media Institute of Southern Africa Malawi chapter chairperson Teresa Ndanga wrote when she shared her picture, highlighting the gap in her teeth: “I love this unique feature. If I am in a mask and people want to verify if I am indeed Teresa, they ask me to remove my mask and smile to show the gap hahaha. I love it.”

Another lady, Monica Kumwenda, who also shared a photo celebrating her big body wrote: “Challenge accepted. If you got it, flaunt it. I am proudly curvy.”

In random interviews, women told Chill how over the years, they too have endured all sorts of bullying either online or in real life due to their bodies.

Said Ellen Kotokwa, a Ndirande Township resident: “As a secondary school student, my classmates teased me a lot for having a big body. Even though I never ate too much, but they called me chimadyo [someone who eats a lot] just because of my body type. It used to hurt, but now I have come to accept myself.”

She said such hurtful comments, though sometimes shared as jokes, go a long way in affecting one’s self-esteem.

In a separate interview, another Blantyre-based Maria Nyoni said it is beautiful to see the features that she used to be bullied about being celebrated.

“I have a big forehead and I was teased growing up. It is great to realise that I am not alone and that many with similar features are happy with their looks regardless of what a few misguided souls think,” she said.

Nyoni said growing up she used to don hairstyles that would alter her forehead, but now she highlights the forehead with hairstyles and make up.

“I am now proud of my unique feature. Poems like the ones done by Tendai Shaba are what we need to change the narrative,” she said.

Arts enthusiast and University of Malawi lecturer Wonderful Mkhutche said poetry is a window into society and that is reflected in the poems by Shaba.

He said: “Shaba has managed to express the problem of body shaming most women face in our society. The poems have successfully stretched our minds into embracing how different women are.

“Whether thick or thin, tall or short, dark or light-skinned, the poems have raised our consciousness towards understanding that beauty comes in all kind of formations and giving women the ability to celebrate and appreciate themselves, just as they are.” Shaba is a renowned poet and book author.