Chithyola Banda’s sosisanomics

Dear Diary,

It appears some oddities of 2023 have spilt over into 2024. Look, for instance, at how suicide cases continue to alarm us! Just this week, an 18-year-old committed suicide because his aunt rebuked him for having a string of girlfriends. As if that were not odd enough, he scribbles his suicide note on the wall of her aunt’s house in Mponela.

It remains true that we will really need to get serious on mental health issues as a country.

And then, it appears the church is also going through its own baptism of fire. When Pope Francis set it out that Roman Catholic priests can bless homosexual couples, some frowned while the liberal ones felt this was a move in the right direction not only against homophobia.

While the sommersaults were still raging BBC Africa released a documentary titled Disciples: The Cult of TB Joshua. It is a damning in-house revelation of the alleged misdeeds of the acclaimed televangelist. Some wondered why such a documentary was released now, when the man of God died in 2021. Following this line of thought, Dear Diary, the proponents believe the BBC was just up to malign the dead, especially given that TB Joshua was an African.

Whatever the case, having watched the three episodes, each a little over 50 minutes long, it is the part where the whistle blowers claim TB Joshua knew something was not right in the construction of the guest house which collapsed, killing over 100 people seeking assistance. The cover up and failure to find justice even where the coroner found TB Joshua in the wrong is, simply, amazing.

Then, while you are at it General Secretary of the CCAP Blantyre Synod Anderson Juma told a reporter the church is in a K2 billion debt.

Never mind that the context for the revelation, but what is clear is that it raised questions for many as to how the church arrived at such a debt. It really must be a blow for my dear reverend to find that the coffers are in that state while he is still ruing on how to fulfill his agenda.

Let sleeping dogs lie.

It appears the tempo towards 2025 is gaining. We have seen Prophet David Mbewe getting his Liberation for Economic Freedom registered. Never mind the tautology in the name, but Mbewe has put it that he will get 70 percent of the vote even where the elections were held yesterday. That, he says, he will do without an alliance. Elections always come with their drama!

And then, we have seen a number of Parliamentarians donating to churches in their home villages so that their names are not forgotten. Dear Diary, their football trophies are in plain site and they are jumping into every philanthropic acrobatic just to be seen as gracious and merciful.

If you go to the funeral today, you will find that incumbent and shadow MPs are in a bid to outshine each other on who gives more condolence. Yet, when they get the seats, they will vanish into thin air, claiming it is not their duty to buy coffins!

Minister of Finance and Economic Affairs  Simplex Chithyola Banda has been going to town with pre-budget consultations. What impact the consultations really make remains to be seen. For that matter, why are the consultations taken to the people at Nthalire in Chitipa or kwa Bereu in Nsanje?

These consultations are somewhat a waste of time for we all know drafters of the budget are already up with trying to convince the rest of us that this time around they will be frugal.

The end note from the finance minister is a word he has introduced in the economics lexicon: Sosisa. If he had not explained that it is an acronym for Sosten (Gwengwe), Simplex (Chithyola) and Sam (Kawale) those on the street would have thought he was saying: Sotsitsa (they will not bring down the price of goods and cost of living).

A penny for your thoughts and we wait to see what sosisanomics will bring us in this New Year.