Don’t overburden others
“I shall continue having children until all of them are out of my waist,” I heard one woman say. And for a long time, women have believed and still believe that their loins contain the babies they eventually bear. Hence, they will have as many children as when the loins ‘dry’ up and stop giving any more. Wow! One would think that in this day and era, almost everyone would know the process of baby manufacturing and that the role played by the waist is simply to help usher them in and out of the womb.
Reading the Brains story on page 3, the concerns raised herein about the need to produce manageable children is understandable. It makes no sense to bear children we do not know what to do with or cannot afford to fend for. Some argue that they bear many children in case some die so they have some remaining. Plausible maybe, but what if they die from starvation due to the inability of parents to look after them.
This brings to mind the many children walking the streets begging or robbing people. It brings to mind the many criminals earning a living from theft because they were unable to attend proper schools for proper career development. And while not all criminals are from disadvantaged families, some of the calamities we encounter can be averted if we manage our decisions in terms of how many children one should bear, raise and nurture into responsible adults and citizens.
Yet, still, to some, the subject of family planning and contraceptives is a taboo. Without being judgemental, it makes no sense to see a whole family begging or a pregnant woman doing likewise. If she cannot feed herself, why bring another mouth to the world to be fed by someone else. Help does come from all ends, but the initial help on a child must come from those that bear her/him before plunging the burden on others.
And Inkosi Chimalizeni’s Family Values page 5 entry this week Man of God is also a romantic got me thinking. He says some men who pray tend to neglect their intimate sides to leave their women hanging sexually. Well, the message should go to all men out there in terms of how they treat women.
Romance does not have to begin just before a sexual encounter. It can start with a little naughtiness during the day when the couple is away and going about their business. This can come in form of naughty texts or flirty phone calls to get each other in a romantic mood. I am no expert and have simply read this elsewhere, but this applies to the woman as well. Do you know even the holding of hands raises eyebrows on the streets as if one has already undressed, judging from the stares? Our society depicts intimacy as a bedroom matter, a fact that limits couples from exercising freedom of romance for fear of being judged. However, al little effort just might take things to a level we never dreamed. Let’s try harder.
