Let’s burn the Warriors!
A couple of months ago, my boss Gracian Tukula informed me about an advert he had come across on the Internet inviting applications for those interested to give English language lessons to Brazilian prostitutes to enable them communicate with their clients during the 2014 World Cup.
My reaction was that I would jump at the opportunity, not only to teach them the Queen’s language, but also the techniques of the game.
But I would love to travel to Brazil with my beloved Flames taking part in the 2014 World Cup party.
But to boost their chances of achieving that ambitious feat, the Flames need to win the forthcoming games, starting with the one against Namibia’s Brave Warriors tomorrow [Wednesday] . While it certainly won’t be a stroll in the park for our boys, it will all boil down to game plan and self-belief.
After all, who the hell are the Brave Warriors of Namibia anyway? Aren’t they just immigrant bushmen among whom the famous good ‘ole movie The Gods Must Be Crazy, in which a funny guy called N!xau was the main actor, originated from? That is what Namibia is known for other than football.
There is also a popular township called Katutura in the capital Windhoek, made up of literally tin shacks where people live in and are converted into shabeens and brothels during the day. It is also popular for ‘kapana’—their own version of ‘kanyenya’— a mixture of sliced grilled red meat and fat.
Of course, there were times when the Flames would turn into chocolate fireguards whenever they faced Namibia in the past, but that was when the Namibians had exciting players such as Eliphas Shivute who impressed me with his magical skills the last time I watched him in Windhoek.
That said, something tells me we will have a braai tomorrow ngati tinamutidzimula pakhomo pa amake ndiye kulili kwathu kuno? Asa! I hope they have brought enough of their famous Windhoek Lager to drown their sorrows after the game, if not our minibus touts will provide them with the ‘BlackBerry’ sachets. Let us burn the bushmen of Namibia guys! Go! Flames Go! Glory be to God! Uloliwe. Uloliwe wayidudula hi..Nang’esiza! [The train is pushing!].
