Malawi needs strong, powerful local government

We, that is, Abiti Joyce Befu, also known as MG 66, the Native Authority Mandela, Sheikh Jean-Philippe LePoisson, and I, drove from our temporary residence in Mzuzu, Nkhata Bay to Blantyre to do one thing: protest verbally at the venue of the third and final Presidential Debate, and, if push came to shove, disrupt the event.

Except for MG 66’s concerns about our security in Blantyre at such an important and heavily policed event, we were satisfied that, by having three presidential debates in two regional cities in a regionally-cum-tribally-polarised country like Malawi, the organisers of the presidential debates were unfair, unreasonable, insensitive, inconsiderate, and at the worst, part of the regionalism school of thought.

However, when we stopped at Kasungu Inn to freshen up and take one fantakoko for the road, Abiti Joyce Befu, still apprehensive about our quasi-suicidal mission to disrupt the final presidential debate in Blantyre, asked if one of us in the car had a phone number for one of the presidential debates organisers. I took out my Noophiya Lumia 10 mobile phone, scrolled through the numbers and found an old acquaintance’s number.

“I got George, here,” I said as I dictated the number to Sheikh Jean-Philippe. He called George and put his Zamzungu 7.0 tablet on hands-free.

“Hi, who’s it?” a voice answered on the other end.

“Jean-Philippe, Sheikh Jean-Philippe.”

“What can I do for you?”

“We are coming down to Blantyre to protest and, if necessary, disrupt the presidential candidate debate tonight because…”

“You will be arrested and deported. This is a serious national event, and we cannot allow foreigners to interfere with the May 20 elections!” George interrupted Jean-Philippe.

“I have warned these guys several times today alone; but they are so adamant and so straight-jacketed in their plans that it is almost impossible to sway them,” Abiti came in.

“Why did you decide to hold three presidential debates in Lilongwe and Blantyre when you know Malawi is a country of regionalistic or ethnic thinking?” Native Authority Mandela asked.

“What does that mean?” George asked.

“Why did you not hold one debate in Mzuzu?” Native Authority Mandela went on.

“We wish we could; but Mzuzu in Mpoto, like Zomba or Mangochi in the Eastern Region, doesn’t have the facilities to handle such an event,” George explained.

“Why don’t the places you have mentioned not have the facilities?” Native Authority Mandela went on.

“That’s beyond me and my colleagues. Goodbye,” George said and cut the line.

Abiti Joyce Befu looked at us, matronly scanning our faces in slow motion. Even in her silence, I could hear her ask: ‘What next?’

“Mission aborted!”I said.

“Why?” Native Authority Mandela asked, surprised at my u-turn.

“I have understood George’s explanation. Besides, Sheikh Jean-Philippe risks being deported. Remember, his temporary residence permit expired last week,” I said.

“I am disappointed at your cowardice! Something tells me we still need to go ahead and protest!” Native Authority Mandela fumed.

“Why?”

“Because, the failure to hold the Presidential Debates in Mangochi or Mzuzu is symptomatic of the unfair way the Malawi government has treated these areas in the past. Everything called development is either in Blantyre or Lilongwe. If we don’t protest now, the trend will continue. Can’t you see sense in that?  Besides, none, not even a single presidential candidate has talked about how he or she is going to address this issue of regional inequality,” Native Authority Mandela said.

“One of the candidates has promised to decentralise the financing of development activities to districts and local areas. That way every region, district and area shall plan and implement its own development. Consequently, nobody, no area, shall blame anybody for underdevelopment and exploitation. Malawi needs strong and powerful local government. Weaker central government means more people-centred programming, which means empowerment or mphamvu kwa ife or nothing for us without us, which means development. Decentralisation is the way to go,” Jean-Philippe said.

“And who is this candidate?”

“Read his 20-point plan!”