My mother in-law is a jerk

Biggie,

I have been married to my lovely wife for a two years. But these have been some of the most miserable two years in my life.

My wife is a tolerant being, sweet to the bone and I love her with my everything.

But her mother will not stop giving me flack for every little mistake that I make, reminding me at every juncture how I am unfit for her daughter.

I am not saying I am flawless, but I believe most of the criticism directed towards me by my mother in law is not in good faith.

I think she is out to destroy me and to kill my self-esteem, which she has succeeded in doing.

Biggie, how do I get this evil woman out of my life?

Frank, Mzuzu

Sibweni,

I can tell at you were not raised properly, because if you were, they should have told you that you do not call your mother in-law evil or a jerk, no matter her flaws.

Culturally, your mother in-law becomes your mother as soon as you put a ring on her finger.

So tell me this, would you call your own mother a jerk, however she wrongs you?

Every night you sleep in the same bed with your wife and you have the audacity to call the woman who birthed her evil? Cmon man.

The English say the fruit does not fall far from the tree. And if your wife is her mother’s daughter, then she might as well be evil.

And you say your wife is sweet and all that. But who raised her? Be thankful for the kind of woman your mother in-law raised.

If you have issues, be a man and sit down with your mother in-law as you would with your mother.

She is probably just focused on protecting her daughter from being hurt that she does not see that she is hurting you.

Enough said.

BMW

Big Man Wamkulu

Biggie, I am married, with three kids. The thing is, I have been seeing this spare wheel for some time, until my wife found some messages in my phone. I have always told her she is just a friend. It has been a while, and I have not been in touch with the girl until some two weeks ago when I called the girl after she beeped me. Now the wife is on my neck, night and day, saying if I am saying the truth I should make an effort that the two meet before this year ends. Otherwise, she has threatened she will take the issue to the ankhoswe. What do I do?

James, Machinjiri

Dear James,

What is astounding is how you gathered enough courage to write me to seek advice. Because, honestly, I do not see how I can help you.

Your problem is self inflicted and I do not see the morality of helping you ahead of deserving people who have some really serious marital problems.

Yours is not a problem, it is a stupidity that I cannot and will not condone.

BMW is a serious advisory space, not a sanctuary for cheating husbands who are too stupid that they even get caught by their wives. Not once. But twice!

My dear James, there is no cure for stupidity. Trust me.

The only advice I can give you is: next time you decide to cheat on your wife, put a freaking password on your phone!

Right now, you’re on your own mate. Good luck.

Biggie