Kythrina phiri: miss christian africa

Reigning Miss Christian Africa Kythrina Phiri would have been long dead before the continental pageant.

However, fate would have it otherwise because at the event held in Cameroon last year, she prevailed.

The 27-year-old may also not have been standing in shopping mall corridors, like she did in Lilongwe recently, hugging heart-broken strangers; potentially caressing their hearts with an anointing of comfort and hope.

And, the banner she carried which proclaimed: If you are stressed, depressed or have anxiety, come get a free hug and a rose, should not have existed, let alone electrified social media as comprehensively as it did.

Kythrina’s life, for a full year, was an agonising voyage, laced with depression that triggered episodes of suicide.

“Suicidal thoughts came to me, not once or twice, but several times. It was the only way to ease the pain,” she recalls.

The year 2020 marked the turning point from a life with a promise to one without. It followed a failed business venture.

She had assigned someone, who she concealed his identity, to be buying farm produce for resale at a profit. He ended up squandering her money.

“The unfortunate part was that the funds were a loan from the village bank. Whether I liked it or not, I had to give it back with interest,” she narrates.

Kythrina’s efforts to recover the money hit a snag. She tells Everywoman: “I involved the police, but they never helped me.”

In the aftermath of her unsuccessful mission, the sand beneath her life began to crumble, marking the start of her race to the bottom.

She remembers staying awake during nights until the last cock’s crow.

“I was depressed and exhausted. The best solution, I repeatedly thought, was to take my life,” she jogs back through her memory lane.

Her fall, she points out, was worsened by lack of support from her closest relatives and friends who instead mocked her for being careless with her business execution.

While seemingly wearing a face that depicts a hangover of pain, Kythrina recalls: “I was bullied. I was judged and called all sorts of names.”

As debts soared and a solution was not in sight, she turned to God.

It was probably the right decision. After all, scriptures tell us that “come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

Kythrina says she underwent a series of spiritual therapies through her pastor. It helped as her pain started to ease, somewhat.

“This step helped me. My prayer life grew and I trusted God,” she says.

After nine agonising months, Kythrina finally managed to summon up a smile as a relative she least expected to rescue her came forth.

The relative cleared out the debt which had risen dangerously due to piling interests.

“The year was drawing to its final month, when every village bank member is mandated to clear all their debts. I was really panicking before the bail-out,” she recollects, taking a deep sigh that typifies the relief that was.

The depression left Kythrina, who is also the 2022 Miss Christian Malawi, with scars of low confidence.

To boost her self-esteem, she decided to challenge for the beauty crowns.  And so, she did and triumphed with flying colours.

It is her traumatising past that has set her on a path towards promoting positive mental health.

She has made this the core of her Miss Christian Africa reign.

“I am determined to use the title to advocate for positive mental health among the youths in churches and communities. If I survived, we all can survive,” she states with a seal of emphasis.

Malawi is currently battling alarming suicide cases. Last year alone, 383 cases were recorded and in January 2023 alone, there were already 29 cases.

From her battle with depression, Kythrina observes that lack of support from close relatives and friends, might be a key factor in ugly suicide statistics.

The rejection she suffered at the peak of her depression inspired her hugs and roses’ initiative being implemented under her Yamos Christian Campaign.

Yamos is a depressing mechanism Kythrina is promoting to help people conquer suicide.  In its fullness it means: You First. Acceptance. Move on Quickly. Open Up. Socialise.

“A lot of people say we need to open up about mental health, but when a person does open up, we are the same people who judge.

“So, I decided to do something that would get people to come to me without actually saying what they are going through, but would get a comforting gesture which was a hug or rose flower or both,” the journalism and mass communication graduate says.

During the initiative, she hugged over 100 people and shared 50 roses. She looks at  the experience as comforting to the depressed.

“Going to a stranger to get comfort without saying what is eating you inside would surely give someone hope. It’s the first step,” she reflects.

Moving forward, Kythrina, born in a family of two, is planning to reach out to more people that are trapped in depression.

“We have something coming up in partnership with Podcast Malawi where we will create open talking platforms where people can come, talk their mind, cry, rant and this will be a pop-up podcast in public spaces.

“It’s part of getting people to open up and talk to someone, even strangers,” she concludes.

As day follows night, nature dictates that nothing lasts forever. So, the end shall always come. However, efforts must be made to stop  premature deaths.

That surely is an uphill task, but Kythrina is, in the best of ways, slowly, but surely trying to accomplish it.