Malawian politicians are the best in the world

Last week, we told the world what it already knew. We said, and we repeat, Malawi is the best country in the world.  We listed a lot of reasons that lead us to conclude that Malawi is the best country in the world.

In its entry on Malawi, the authoritative tourism guide, Lonely Planet, writes “Travellers to Malawi will probably find themselves forming friendships and connections quickly, as Malawians are generally keen to greet and engage with visitors.” 

Need you further require proof that Malawi is the best country in the world?

Another element contributing to Malawi being the best place to be born in, live, die, be buried, be forgotten, resurrect, and return to is its politicians.

Elsewhere, politicians are known to coalesce around a political theory or ideology. In the United State of America, the United Kingdom and most of Europe, people often identify themselves as conservative, liberals, socialists, democrats, Christian democrats, social democrats, Greens (environmentalists), nationalists, and other ideologies. 

Away from Europe, especially in Asia, we also have communists. There are also politicians following communism with Chinese characteristics, a brand espoused by the current leader, Xi Jinping. They will live and die defending what they believe in. If they form alliances, the alliances are of the like-minded.

That is not the case in Malawi. Here we used to believe that the only element around which politicians coalesced is tribe and since most tribes are found in regions, regionalism was also an element. 

However, tribalism and regionalism are waning and Malawi is, pang’ono ndi pang’ono turning into a non-tribalist society and Inshallah, tribalism will die as a political ideology.

Otherwise, our politicians are without political ideology, but real democrats who can, like chameleons, change from one party colour to another and back like voters themselves do. Unlike elsewhere, here in the land of sour milk and bitter honey politicians believe that there is no permanent enemy, and, of course, no permanent friend, in politics. This is a very mature approach.

After the elections, voters sit together to listen to election results broadcasts. After the result announcement, the voters go to drink and eat together. Why should rivalry of the campaign period enslave our politicians into persistent enemies?  Our politicians are the best in the world.

Unlike elsewhere, here our politicians know what the country needs, food security first.  They know we have water in the lakes, rivers and underground.  You can sink a borehole anywhere in Malawi and you will find good quality water for irrigating crops and for home use.

Malawi has adequate biomass and human urine to be used for rebuilding and fertilising the soil so that it gives us more yield per unit area of land.

President ka(Ngwazi) Bingu wa Mutharika started constructing a chemical fertiliser production factory at Kanengo but construction stopped while he was alive because our politicians are great tacticians. They know that if the people, the voters, have adequate food, they will become bellyful and forget who matters most in the country. That is why no leader has continued the fertiliser factory project.

Here is how our great politicians work. Identify the problem; identify the culprit; propose a solution; get elected; propose a budget in Parliament and get it passed; start implementing the programme; then stop. Then restart when election days get close to show that the government is still working on the project.

Didn’t we say Malawi has the best politicians in the world?