One thought for Mai Busa, Prophets’ wives

So, it is common knowledge that we look at our spiritual leaders for help, support and guidance in spiritual matters and any other matter from time to time. It is also common knowledge that mostly these spiritual leaders are commonly accused of ‘brainwashing’ their followers to give more and more to church to the extent of probably giving more than half of their salaries to their church. Prophets and preachers have seen it all, accused of it all.

But there is one side we do not talk about-the challenges that these spiritual leaders’ wives face because of the position of their husbands in the ministry or church. They are the forgotten/ignored victims.

Writing through the experience of a prophet’s wife, this week we are looking at some of the extreme behaviour that prophets and preachers wives have to endure on a daily basis as part of supporting their husbands.

We have single female members of the church who call or text their married male spiritual leaders just to say good morning. This is followed by various texts ‘checking’ on the abusa throughout the day. When Mai Busa sees this and she is uncomfortable, she is even afraid to say a word against it, least she be accused of being a stumbling block on the udindo that her husband holds.

Then we have those who push and push to get close to the prophet commonly known as Papa. These female members will tell ‘Papa’ all their personal challenges on the pretext that he will give her guidance. This is followed by incessant texts and phone calls some which do come at odd hours when ‘Papa’ and wifey are also trying to have their time as a couple. This also causes madam prophet to be uncomfortable.

Then we have those who visit Papa prophet like they are going to the toilet. Every time, they come with a situation that needs the prophet’s prayer and counselling. Again, pushing and pushing closer to the man of God while making his wife uncomfortable.

We also have sisters in Christ who are fond of ‘gifting’ Papa whenever they feel like. They will buy shirts, those shiny suits and shoes, but will completely ignore Mai prophet in the process.   

We also have female members of the ministry/church who are fond of giving Papa Prophet money while at the same time giving madam prophet the attitude.

But now here is the catch. Madam prophets are dying in silence. They cannot say anything to complain. Even when female members of the church are getting too close to the prophet the just die inside as they know that speaking out will bring ridicule to their husband’s bread and butter. They are also looked at as the ones to give out advice. Now if the advisor is complaining what will the ministry or church look like?

Mai Busa at times goes for months without being touched by her husband as he is busy with spiritual issues. But she cannot complain. As a loyal wife, she keeps quiet to protect her husband’s name and ministry.

It is time to call out some of these behaviours by female members of ministries and churches that bring pain to Mai Busa or Mai Prophet. These are human beings who also need their time with their husbands without members always visiting, calling and texting. There has got to be a cut off point.

On the other hand, it takes a real man to protect his wife’s feelings against any form of pain, including overenthusiastic female members of the church. If the prophet continues to entertain such, then it is his fault as well. A wise spiritual leader will separate these two and have time for his family too no matter how big his ministry is. Nothing is more important than family. Mukuchitika zinthu mmalo opempheramu!