Let us face it, age is not just a number, it matters

So, there is this famous saying that age is just a number.

  Well, I don’t know who started this and how they came to this conclusion, but I have a different take when it comes to age. It is definitely not just a number. It matters. Those figures are not just for decoration. For example, our age. The figures are not there just for decoration or they plucked off a tree. They are arrived at depending on how long someone has lived on this mother earth.

Now, my primary reason for addressing this topic today is to explore the connection between age, relationships, and marriage. I know that just mentioning the topic will provoke some who are in relationships with significant age gaps to react defensively; that’s a natural response. Let me make my case as well. I know in my heart of hearts, even those who will strongly and publicly disagree with me, will, when alone agree with me that age matters. This thing that our society is normalising where small girls find themselves in love relationships or marriages of convenience with older men has serious downsides.

Let me break it down by explaining my reasoning.

Life stages: When an older partner is in a relationship with a much younger person, the challenges often arise from their different stages in life. For instance, a woman in her 20s is still figuring out her path, focusing on education and exploration, while her older partner may be settled or nearing retirement. Initially, these differences might serve as points of attraction, but as time passes, they can create significant obstacles. Different aspirations and life goals may lead to cracks in the relationship that become hard to mend.

Infidelity: Many older individuals who pursue younger partners believe that their financial resources will ensure loyalty and fidelity. However, they are mistaken. Every person has emotional and physical needs, and a 60-year-old man typically cannot satisfy the desires of a 25-year-old woman—except in isolated cases. Initially, the younger partner may be dazzled by gifts and financial support, but eventually, the lack of genuine intimacy may lead her to seek relationships with men her own age. This cycle can contribute to the spread of sexually transmitted infections, as many younger women, while in a financial relationship with older men, may also be involved with younger partners for more satisfactory physical connections—look around and look really hard, you will agree with me.

Financial Disparity: A young person just starting their career cannot match the financial stability of someone who has been working for years. In some cases, the older partner may use their financial status to manipulate or mistreat the younger partner, leading to unhappiness and even depression.

Family disapproval:

How many families are genuinely happy to see their 25-year-old in a relationship or marriage with a 60-year-old? While love is fundamentally between two individuals, disapproval from family can create immense pressure and unhappiness. Relationships are challenging enough without external negativity; having that added pressure can further undermine the couple’s bond.

While there are isolated cases where significant age differences result in successful and loving relationships, the reality is that age does matter. The truth is, age gap should not be too large. Those numbers represent something significant: experience, maturity, and the progression of life(kukalamba). Age matters a lot in relationships.