Why change the child’s surname after separation?

The decision to change a child’s surname after parental separation is a complex and sensitive issue that sparks intense debate. On one hand, changing the surname can simplify family dynamics, especially when the mother remarries. As sociologist Dr. Judith Stacey notes, “Children’s surnames can be a powerful symbol of family unity and belonging.” Dr. Jennifer Brown, a child psychologist, adds, “A shared surname can foster a sense of identity and cohesion within the family.” This change promotes family unity, particularly when new siblings are born, and shields the mother from unwanted attention and judgmental inquiries about her children’s paternity.

However, there are also compelling arguments against changing a child’s surname. Dr. Robert Emery, a psychologist specialising in family relationships, cautions, “Changing a child’s surname can disrupt their sense of identity and connection to their biological father.” Sociologist Dr. Kathleen Gerson agrees, “A child’s surname is often a tangible link to their family history and cultural heritage.”

Furthermore, changing the surname can be seen as undermining the father’s parental rights and responsibilities. Dr. Michael Lamb, a psychologist and expert on father-child relationships, argues, “A child’s surname is an important aspect of their identity and heritage, and should not be changed without careful consideration.” Dr. Jeylan Mortimer, a sociologist studying family dynamics, notes, “Fathers’ rights and responsibilities should not be diminished without compelling reasons.”

In Malawi, the Births and Deaths Registration Act (1997) and the Children’s Act (2010) provide the legal framework for surname changes, requiring consent from both parents and a court order. Yet, beyond the legal considerations, it is crucial to examine the emotional, social, and psychological implications of such a decision.

In conclusion, while there are valid arguments on both sides, it is essential to prioritise the child’s best interests and well-being. Changing a child’s surname should not be taken lightly, and consideration should be given to the potential long-term effects. Ultimately, a collaborative approach between both parents, with the child’s needs at the forefront, is crucial. This may involve maintaining the original surname, using a hyphenated surname, or finding alternative solutions that respect the child’s identity and relationships with both parents.