What’s up Biggie?
Biggie, I have been married to this man I so love for close to 10 years now. We have two kids, a boy and a girl, and I must say these are the real bundle of joy any parent can ask for.
You see, Biggie, I feel the kids are enough and for some time now, I have been asking my hubby to go for a vasectomy. I ask this because I feel all the family planning methods I have been on have left me with so many side effects.
But hey, whenever I bring up the topic, it is as if I have opened the gates of hell.
I really needed him to ‘vasectomise’ yesterday. How do I get him under the knife on this one?
Lily, via WhatsApp
Yours is truly a strange one. It is a very strange thing to ask in a country where only less than 15 people have gone for vasectomy, or so I am told.
I will tell you one thing: I am a firm believer of bodily autonomy. Here I strongly hold this truth to be self-evident: That anyone and everyone have the right to do what they want with their bodies.
Why many men avoid vasectomy like the plague is, simply, baffling.
Your guess is just as good as mine. Many men feel that their relationship with their wives may come to an end at some point and when they remarry, they would want to have another set of kids! So, they just want to be sure that if the marriage hits a dead end, they should be safe.
They all have cause to worry because unlike most of the family planning methods for women, vasectomy is (as far as I know) irreversible. Once it’s done, it can never be undone! Most of the men I know don’t love putting their eggs in one basket.
But then, some men feel that by, to use your word, being vasectomised, they will lose virility. There is a misconception out there that when men are vasectomised, they would never satisfy a woman in bed. This is a fallacy!
All that operation does is to ‘sever’ the vas deferens which carries seed in the man’s reproductive tract. So, in essence, a man will still be able to get hard even after this operation. That is why men must understand that even when they are ‘vasectomised’, they can contract sexually transmitted infections. Take care; you still need that protection brother!
So, to come to your question: You can take a horse to the well, but you can’t force it to drink. Talk it out with your mate. But knowing how rigid men are when it comes to losing fertility, I can only wish you good luck in your trial!