Notes From The Gutter

I’ll party without Monada!

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I was in a supermarket with an old newsroom friend at the weekend when I got a real reminder that ‘the crazy time of the year’ is back!
The shop was over-decorated with pine tree branches and decked with long strings of blinking lights.


Christmas carols welled from all corners, seemingly purposively tuned to a pitch low and sensual enough to smoothly burrow into shoppers heads without any resistance.


And bewitch the shoppers into some wild expenditure the music really did! I am sure of that because of the way loaves of bread were hastily pinched by the ‘spine’, on to baskets and trolleys!
Packets of rice, bottles of cooking and kilos of meat unlimitedly dropped into shopping baskets.


I was busy with the friend discussing who would make 2108 Who’s Who List in the arts and entertainment circles, mainly the categories of best song, album and live band performance.
Then our eyes landed on a lanky guy picking off a shelf two big bottles of cheap alcohol.


He was looking already ‘expired’ from some binge. He walked, smelt and sounded grilled.
With one of his tattered slippers conveniently ‘parked’ in his back pocket, he staggered his way towards the cash registers, attempting to singalong to the music that filled the supermarket.


“Apapa wapezekatu best singer and dancer,” joked the friend, to which we all laughed and inadvertently attracted the lanky guy’s attention.


“Olo museke! Apapa ofunika kunyenyeka basi! [Laugh all you want! What is left for me for now is to get more hammered]!” He announced straight in my direction.
We walked past him and turnedto him once more to examine his pick of alcohol.


“Mukuyang’ana chani? Mukapitiriza ndimenyatu ‘Idibala!’ [what are you looking at? Should you continue I will collapse!]” Warned the lanky guy.
Teasingly, he let himself slump to the floor in the fashion and spirit of the new sensation that is King Monada’s song, Malwedhe.


The persona in the Monada’s song warns their partner against any heartbreak. In the persona’s warning, things unlikeable will make them collapse from a disease they carry.


Now, I know this is one song that will light up Christmas and New Year parties. The song has made unstoppable inroads to many music lovers’ hearts.


It is the signature of music today.But I, like some people out there, have issues with the number.


I know the song, to all appearances, carries undertones of looking down at people with epilepsy. It is a valid observation the song has that stain.


For many people out there, their joy in the song might be innocent.
But to say the truth, I buy more into the school of thought that wants the song as far away from their ears as possible. It rides on a wrong premise.
My Christmas and New Year’s party is without Monada!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!n

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