Biggie,
Hope this finds you in good order. I am writing you about this other man.
He has been a man of my life. He has been there for me, supporting my business and my other financial needs.
At some point, when we were very much in love, he used to tell me he wanted another child but his wife was not ready to have another child. You heard me right, his wife. I knew all along that he was married although he spent some nights at my crib.
In the spur of the moment, I opened up to him. I am now four months pregnant but he has stopped taking my calls. He never responds to my WhatsApp messages although I see he has read them. It is even more painful that he is always the first to see every time I post a status.
I have decided to move on with my life, but I know there will come a day he will come scampering for his kid. Will I be wrong to tear him to pieces then?
Dorothy,
Blantyre.
Hey Doro,
You find yourself in a sad but avoidable situation. It was naïve of you to believe his word that his wife was not ready for another child! It was very absurd for you to open up your legs for her with no protection when you knew the consequences.
I am double sure a good number of your lot have left themselves in such a situation recently. Some have been fooled with bouquets for Valentine’s Day and nights out on that day.
Men do so many things to get what they want. Men are no longer just mere dogs, they take women as cats these days. Amakonda pusipusi! When you want to strike a cat, umamunyengerera. Mind you, I am neither sexist nor a misogynist, but these are just analogs.
Boosting your business was a way of tricking you into thinking life would always be rosy. Sleeping over at your house was his way of getting more trust from you, and creating the picture that all was not rosy on his marital bed! You swallowed it all hook, line and sinker.
I have said it before that without standing against the rules of nature, claiming that I know where exactly life begins, it is only normal that women could be given the chance to choose which pregnancy to maintain or not. You may call me a charlatan but why are condoms allowed and promoted in a country that prohibits abortion? Like it or not, life begins when both the man and woman come so there is no difference between using a male or female condom and terminating a pregnancy.
I know there is that sister or auntie or even friend who was encouraging you all along to still see this married man. As long as you keep it a secret and respect the wife, they told you, everything will be alright. Where are they today? Most possibly they are gossiping about your calamity.
Take heart, Doro, take heart. All is not lost, and we learn through mistakes.
