When Upile Kadiwa held her child one serene morning, it seemed like a trophy symbolising her triumph over years of heartbreak.
While for others childbirth is a mere biological process, for her, it was the conclusion of a battle fought on both physical and spiritual fronts.
Having experienced the pain of two miscarriages, the associate obstetrics and gynaecology specialist found herself at a crossroads during her third pregnancy, a moment that would lead to a life-altering revelation.
“I realised then that life isn’t just what we see; it’s deeply spiritual,” she shares in a reflective, but steady voice.
It was this moment Upile discovered that spirituality cannot be downplayed as far as matters of pregnancy are concerned.
“It was during my third pregnancy that I began questioning everything. I realised the challenges I was facing were more than physical. They were deeply spiritual and needed to be sorted out as such,” she says.
In her deep meditation about her predicament, she got to understand that God works through His principles and the spiritual key, when activated, leads to specific answers one desires.
“For instance, the Bible says: ‘Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.’”
“This highlights the importance of keeping God’s Word as a guiding principle in life. To succeed in all areas and grow spiritually, one must consistently meditate on and apply the word of God. It serves as a foundational principle for spiritual growth and prosperity,” she says.
Determined to break the cycle of pain, Upile says she immersed herself in understanding God’s principles that influence pregnancy.
“I discovered that many issues on pregnancy, infertility, miscarriages and losses often have spiritual roots,” she explains.
This revelation not only helped her carry her fourth pregnancy to term, but also gave her the tools to overcome the challenges that followed.
“Having been privileged to this revelation which made me hold a baby, l thought it wise to document this in a book called Spiritual Preparation for Pregnancy, so that other women who have passed through a similar situation should be helped,” says Upile.
Now, as an author and advocate, she is on a mission to share the hard-won lessons from her journey.
On March 3 2025, she will launch her book at a conference under the same name at the Bingu International Convention Centre in Lilongwe.
The book and the conference will explore the role spirituality plays in successful pregnancies.
“The event will bring together medical professionals, mental health experts and spiritual leaders to address issues that have deeply affected women and families across Malawi and beyond,” she says.
Upile says the Spiritual Preparation for Pregnancy Conference is an extension of her vision to share her story for the benefit of others.
She says: “This isn’t just about women. We are also targeting men because they play a crucial role in supporting their partners during pregnancy.
“The conference aims to create a safe space for dialogue, healing and learning,” she adds.
Topics that will be covered during conference will range from the spiritual roots of infertility to coping with loss and navigating the emotional toll of childbearing, according to Upile.
She adds that the conference will also tackle ripple effects of pregnancy-related struggles such as divorce, infidelity and the spread of HIV due to marital discord.
“These issues don’t just affect individuals, they impact families and communities,” she notes.
Upile highlights the importance of addressing emotional and spiritual aspects of childbearing.
She says: “Spirituality heals the mind and soul, which is just as important as physical health during pregnancy.
“Life is not just fun and games or television series. It’s deeply spiritual and we must approach it as such.”
Upile says the book focuses on a holistic approach to pregnancy preparation with emphasis on spirituality as it is a key aspect that leads to success or failure.
“Since I joined the medical field, l have realised how limited our options are when it comes to treating infertility,” she says.
She notes that in most instances, infertility causes are unknown and the absence of an In Vitro Fertilisation (IVF) centre—a fertility treatment medical procedure that involves fertilising an egg with sperm in a laboratory and then transferring the resulting embryo to the uterus—in Malawi, chances of infertile couples getting help are almost slim.
Upile says the cost of accessing IVF outside the country is prohibitive.
“To access IVF, couples have to travel outside Malawi which costs around K15 million for just one cycle. And IVF doesn’t always work the first time, it might take four or five cycles. For the average Malawian, this is simply unaffordable,” she says.
Faced with this grim reality, Upile says she turned to spiritual solutions—a path that not only brought her personal victory, but also inspired her to help others.
“When I applied principles l am about to share during the forthcoming conference, my situation changed. That’s when I knew I had to share this knowledge,” says Upile.
In the book, Upile buttresses the point on how the spiritual world around is influenced by the physical world.
She argues that infertility and miscarriages are a part of spiritual manifestations in the physical bodies and as such they must be dealt with in the spiritual realm.
“For instance, the Bible says ask it shall be given unto you, the process of asking happens in the spirit, but the manifestation of desires is made in the physical,” says Upile.
In her book, Spiritual Preparation for Pregnancy, she outlines the spiritual principles that worked for her and many other women she has helped.
“I have seen women who had been trying for years finally hold their babies and it wasn’t because of expensive treatments, but because they understood the spiritual roots of their struggles,” she says.
